Sunday, September 15, 2013


Genesis 2:2-3 is the first mention of Sabbath rest the day of rest in seven. By his example, God encourages us to designate a portion of our life to rest and spiritual rejuvenation.  Without proper rest, it is difficult to deal with the other matters of life, especially our progress in recovery.  

I was thinking over the last few months that even though I was not working or actively doing an activity daily, that I was getting all the rest and healing that I need. This definitely was proven wrong as my body did not physically heal after surgery and eight months later I am still struggling with pain and swelling.  

I have since come to understand rest is actually an active process, and not a passive process. What I mean by that, is one cannot simply sit on the couch staring at wall for several hours and think they've achieved all the rest necessary to go about their busy lives. Rest is active. Rest is an intentional activity by taking time to emotionally withdraw from outwardly stresses and focus inwardly towards our God in our center. It is actively removing the noise of the world to be replaced with the voice of The Lord.

Dear Heavenly Father,
Today I pray that you guide my heart to find rest in you. 


Sunday, September 8, 2013


I had a couple very helpful conversations yesterday, and I was reminded of some key aspects of my spiritual malady. I was reminded of what life was like when I came into the program. I recall how sad, lonely, and absolutely desperate I felt when I was in the mist of my alcoholism. I remember how isolating life felt to me at that time.  I remember how angry I was at life, and whatever aspect of God I was willing to except at that time. I remember fighting with my child who was young and innocent and yet i was so angry at him for his disobedience and pushing my buttons. I remember feeling disconnected with everybody in my life was when I had not already shut out.  Remember feeling unappreciated by others, and how so many did not appreciate my "help".

Now miracles happened, and they did so because I was willing to identify with God, ask him to take over my life, and I started to work the steps as suggested to me by those who came before me.  And changes occurred. I was amazed, and others were too, halfway before I was through, just as the big book says and the incredible changes that occurred in my life were outstanding!

Now fast-forward four years later, and I still to this moment am sober.  However, I feel as though I recently have been losing what I have gained through this program. I account that loss not to the desire to drink, but Because I have not working my program. I have been feeling as a victim of life. And I've been allowing that loneliness and isolation to over take me as opposed to reaching out to others and giving it away.

What's interesting enough, and I still need to do a lot more exploration on this, is that I replaced my "program" with religion.  I have justified not attending AA meetings because I replaced them with religious meeting.  I have been giving away the bible to others, but not giving away the Big Book.  But I lost my personal connection with God as I have been more focused on the superficial and the "church" without connecting with He who we worship.

I find this is a pattern of my life.  I tend tohyper-focus  on the details, and ignore the deeper meaning. I also tend to develop in my mind how I see something or someone to be, and then I get angry when their life and their decisions don't jive with my own. This is what I have been doing since I have not been working my program. I Have gotten too focused on my own will instead of God's will for myself and for others. 

I have not gone back out to using, but I can't say I haven't been tempted.  It is this gift of reminders and identifying my patterns that I think are His way of showing me I need to do something different.  I need to do what worked for me before.  So, I am going to do the following today to help me get connected again with my program and others.

1. Pray - I have prayed frequently recently, but I have not been doing the prayers suggested in the big book. I need to get back to the 3rd & 7th step prayers again.

2. Read & Write - I am going to seek out the literature again and use this blog as an avenue to journal.  I don't care if it is ever read by another person; I just need to get my thoughts organized so I don't internalize them.

3. Reach out to others - for today, I will call 3 people in the program, and attend a meeting again.

Thank you Jesus for the reminders of my patterns of my patterns that are self-will.  Thank you for the reminders of what i used to be like, what I did differently to be different then, and what I need to do to feel that peace and happiness again.  Thank you for reminding me that alcoholism is a cunning baffling disease and even without taking the first drink that one is vulnerable to alcoholism just by their thoughts and patterns.

Monday, March 5, 2012

lia sophia worn by Wendy Williams

Wendy Williams is wearing lia sophia today! Wendy’s abalone & Mother-of-Pearl with glass beads “Ocean Air” necklace and turquoise and cut crystals “Moxie” bracelet is by lia sophia.

Saturday, March 3, 2012

5 simple tips to to make your butt look smaller!

Let's face it, even though we usually can't see it ourselves, most of us women wish our backends were smaller.  So, today's tip is simple... do 20,000 squats every morning and you will have a firm, round, petite derriere.  Wait, 20,000 squats isn't your cup of tea?  Mine either, so here are some simple fashion tips to make your butt appear smaller.

1. Stand up straight young lady!
Tucking in your pelvis and having good posture lengthens your body and can instantly slim your appearence. Posture is more than just the look of your body. It gives signs about your attitude on life and yourself!
Bad posture can make you look insecure, depressed and uncomfortable. When you stand with good posture, you show you are confident and comfortable with yourself.  So . . . Stand Up Straight!

2. Fit matters
Tight jeans will make your bum appear more shapely and tight. Wearing saggy jeans will make your bum appear saggy and unshapely.  And be sure to utilize a good tailor to fit those pants to you.  You don't need to compromise your shape and wear something ill-fitting when a simple nip and tuck of a waistline or seam can make those pants work for your shape.

3. Do not wear any jeans that go above waste.
When you add more length on the top, you're really adding to the overall length of the butt, which translates to a larger saggy bottom.  A mid-rise is best, just below the belly button, but high enough to cover any potential muffin-top.

4. Divide and Conquer
This tip comes from my friend, Clinton Kelly.  Clinton spoke at the 2011 lia sophia conference, where he explained that where your shirt ends can really impact how your butt looks.  If you tuck, then your entire rear-end is exposed.  Yet, if you completely cover booty with a longer shirt, you're really not fooling anyone and actually the added bulk just adds to the imagination of a huge rump underneath. 

So, Clinton's catchy phrase to remember is "Divide and Conquer!" Hem shirts at the halfway point of the rear.  This balances everything.

5. Accept what your mama gave ya!
Okay JLo, you got some extra junk in the trunk.  The first and most important step to looking good is to not feel ashamed of who you are.  No one really cares if you're shapely on top or bottom or not at all; show people that you are a strong, confident, lovely woman and they will love you just for that!  Seriously, if someone really does think, "Gosh, she seemed like a nice person but with a butt like that I can't be friends with her" then thank GOD you don't have to continue to associate with that beeach and move on with your life.  You are beautiful regardless of the size of your ASSets, so remind yourself of that fact each and every day!

Monday, February 6, 2012

Changing the face of the blog

lia sophia has started a new tool for our team, which offers many of the same features of my Butterfly blog such as tools that we use for our lia sophia business.  I will still have a tab dedicated to lia sophia, but I'll also be expanding the blog to include my overall message of inner beauty, recovery from drugs, alcohol, and eating disorders, and especially about expressing who we are as beautiful women.  Stay tuned to see updates over the next couple of weeks.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

8 questions to ask yourself to know if starting your own lia sophia business should be part of your New Years resolutions

With the economy in the state that it is in, and dozens of Newspapers and TV Shows recommending now is the time to start your own business, people are coming by the thousands to find a home based business that is right for them.  But how do you know which one to choose?  How do you know which one will be a good fit for you?  Is the lia sophia opportunity really right for you?

Thankfully there are literally hundreds of choices of direct sales companies all offering exceptional products and generous compensation plans.   In fact I would even go as far as to say you can have success in ANY of the various companies available – IF it is the right “fit” for you and you commit yourself to working the business.  So how do you know which one is the right fit?  But, starting with an established, reputible and successful company such as lia sophia definitely improves your chance of success.  When comparing direct sales companies, be sure to ask yourself these questions:

1. WHAT are you passionate about?
We all have a passion for something.  What kinds of things can you get really excited about?  Were you the girl helping everyone pick out her dress and jewelry for Prom? Are you are the “Bling Queen” and love to help women feel fantastic adding just a bit of sparkle?  The truth is there are going to be down days in this business, and it will be your passion that gets you through them.   Ask yourself honestly what kind of product you can be so passionate about that you keep on keeping on, even when people are telling you no. 

2.  WHAT are you strengths? 
If you were applying for a job position, what would the strengths be that you are bringing to the table?  Are you organized? A good communicator?  Do you like talking to groups of people or one on one?  Can you talk about delicate subjects and clearly communicate your recommendations?  Some lia sophia advisors are natural sales people; they love sharing the jewelry styles at shows and have incredible sales.  Others are great at sharing the opprotunity with others and manage a successful team by giving their teammembers the support and encouragement needed.  You can build this business exactly around your strengths, and you can also take advantage of the plethora of training available to improve in areas you're not naturally talented at.

3. HOW will you work?
Another great opportunity that lia sophia has to offer is freedom to work your business from your home and by throwing fun parties for groups of women.  I do this part time (4-5 shows a mont), but I have teammembers who work full time (7-10 shows) and those who work casual (1-2 shows a month or less).  But I have also had the opportunity to do one on one consultations and lead large classes and talks about fashion and accessories.  It's importnat to ask yourself many hours can you really commit to building your business, and know that you can do exactly that with lia sophia.

4. WHAT does it cost to be in business?
The cost to start a lia sophia business is low, only $149, and the return is incredible! For just $149, the lia sophia Starter Kit gives you a generous selection of our top-selling styles (valued at more than $1,000), along with everything you need for your first five Shows. 

5. HOW often are new catalogs/product lines released?
Companies continuously add and remove products from their product line, but knowing how often you will be changing your demonstration or adding to your kit is important.   “New products” is a great reason to keep in touch with your customers, but changing your demo every month may also pose a problem.  lia sophia brings in new product twice a year, and only retiring and bringing in a selction of new items not changing the entire catalog.  This way, the product stays current with today's fashion trends, but you don't need to replace your inventory when a new catalog comes out.  Also, advisors on my team have the chance to earn the Gems Kits, up to $1000 worth of jewelry, from the new catalogs!

6. HOW will you be paid?To someone new to the direct sales industry, a Compensation Plan can be pretty overwhelming.  Sadly many companies in an attempt to “stand out” are making their Compensation Plans harder and harder to understand. It is important to know when exploring direct sales companies, do they earn commission – money paid out collectively based on sales of a certain time period, or do you get a buying discount – where you purchase products at one price, and sell for a higher price.  At lia sophia, it's simple.  Every week you are paid 30% commissions, directly deposited to your bank account, for the sales submitted the week before.  If you are a manager, you earn 40% plus 10% of your team.  It never goes up or down based on sales.  It's always cold, green, spendable cash!  You also can earn additional jewlery premiums and all-expenses paid vacations, but your commissions never change!

7. WHAT kind of support does the company offer? 
When trying to choose between direct sales companies, look for what kind of support and tools are offered to the Consultants.  Are there training opportunities available – either in person or virtually?  At lia sophia, we offer optional monthly team meetings, a great opportunity to meet one on one with others in your team.  We also have several online webinars available 24/7, and monthly publications with today's fashion scene and ideas how to share the love of jewelry!  My favorite experience with lia sophia is the annual conference, where the best of the best lia sophia advisors share their shows with us, we hear from celebreties such as Gena Davis and Clinton Kelly, and we have the chace to visit one-on-one with our company's top exectutives!


8. WHAT is the risk of joining?
Some direct sales companies offers a buy-back policy that amount to hundred hoops to jump through, or have a financial penalty for opting out. The best part about lia sophia is if you join and after doing your first 5 shows discover it's not right for you, there is no risk at all.  You get to KEEP the $1000 in jewelry you received in your Starter Kit for yourself with no obligation what so ever! So there's no risk in trying it out for $149; your rewards are beyond the cost to start up!

Choosing the right direct sales company is so important, and I am confident that lia sophia is the right choice for many women.  To learn more, please visit my website here, or call me at 952-212-2900 and I'll be happy to answer any other questions you may have.


Monday, December 26, 2011

Okay, I've collected my 100 NO's, now what?

We've heard it over and over again - "Go for No's!"  The presentation at conference was motivating, our manager's incentives got us going for 100 and we did so, and with a few of those surprising and uplifting "yes" answers along the way.  This marketing strategy is a numbers game. What continues to motivate us is the realization we only need a small number to get started out of the 100 people to get things started. So we continue ignoring the no responses to get to the few “yes tell me more” responses. After wading through our 100 phone numbers we have a few parties set up. But are we going to stop at just our few family and friend to keep this business successful?  Absolutely not!   If we utilize the "Go for No" as our primary marketing strategy, this business will die out and you will not being achieving your dreams through lia sophia as I shared with you when you signed up?  So what more can you do when your call list has ran dry?  

Have you ever had a consultation with a financial advisor? When my advisor started spewing out terms such as stocks, bonds, markets, capital, trusts, and so on, the only comprehension I had was the fact I was glad he was handling this for me and I didn't need to fully understand the market to be able to save for retirement.  But, the one concept he did share that stuck in this cobweb of a brain of mine is DIVERSIFY!  Oh, I know diversify all so well!  Now, he of course meant it to mean limiting investment risk by purchasing different types of securities from different companies representing different sectors of the economy. But I can't help think o the line from the Chappell Show, "If you're tryin to get in the biz you gonna have to diversify your bonds son."  Essentially, diversification means don't put all of your eggs in one basket.  You need a few different sources of referrals and ways to get your name and business out there for your customer base to know you.  Not every marketing tool will be a home-run, but you may get a bite here and there from across various marketing avenues that will eventually add up to a busy calendar.

Don't jump down the rabbit hole looking for an easy way out!
Don't be like Alice and fall victim to the dream that you can chase this business by a simple one step leap of faith.  There are several direct sales marketing gimmicks out there, especially on the internet, that will make promises of auto-generated lists and marketing tools that are scams.

They may look like the following:
  • “We’ll Submit Your Website to Hundreds of Search Engines!” 
  • “Get #1 Ranking in Google!”
  • “We Will Submit Your Website to Over 1,000 Directories!” 
  • Banner Exchange Programs 
  • “Send An Email Ad to 10,000 Opt-In Subscribers”
Our experience is that many of the promises about Internet marketing today are based on what we call the "Aladdin's Lamp Theory of Internet Marketing." You know, you make three wishes, rub the lamp, and then you expect them to instantly come true.First of all, these don't work!  Second, most of which are violations of our lia sophia contract and we risk losing this great opportunity so it's not worth it.  Third, they don't work!  Wait, did I say that already? Well, let me say it again... THEY DON'T WORK!  So don't even bother.

So then, what does work?

The best way to find new leads and keep your business growing is by implementing simple, cost effective, ways to get your name out there in your local community, so that you become known as THE lia sophia lady in town.  
  • The best and most effective way to bring in new shows is by being the best lia sophia adivsor to your current customers and hostesses!  Keep up on your customer's needs.  Have fun at your parties, and encourage bookings at each show.  Even if someone doesn't book that night, you will be planting a seed within them that may grow into a future booking.
  • Give Referral Bonuses.  When holding a party or show, tell customers that when they supply three names of people who actually become customers, they will receive a fixed amount of free product or a dollar amount gift certificate. Referrals can make your direct selling profits soar, if handled correctly. A customer will only supply referrals if they truly trust you and like your product. When you receive these leads, make sure to deliver impeccable customer service to reinforce the relationship of trust.
  • Use your expired catalogs.  Print up some stickers with your contact information, including email and website, that say “Contact Me for a Current Catalog!” Put one on each expired catalog before you begin to distribute them.
    • Leave them on a table in your local library. Our library actually has a box set aside for people to drop off used magazines and books. I’ve picked up catalogs for several direct sales companies there.
    • Drop them off at local doctors, dentists, chiropractors and other offices where people have to wait.
    • Leave one in the dressing room when you try on a new outfit.
    • Cut a circle of netting or sheer fabric (or buy circles ready-made at Michael’s or Hobby Lobby). Place 4-5 Hershey’s Kisses® in the center of the circle and tie with ribbon. Attach one to each expired catalog and drop them off around town in any office that has a receptionist. Consider car dealerships, insurance offices, contractors, etc.
    • Ask if you can drop off a few at your child’s day care center.
    • Leave a few in the restaurant’s restroom when you go out to eat, and leave one on the table with your (generous) tip.
    • Give one to your bank teller when you go through the drive-through.

    • Take a couple with you when you have your nails done.
    • Ask your hairstylist if you can leave a few in her shop. Offer her a discount for any orders that come from there.
    • Drop one off with the secretaries at your local elementary, middle and high schools.
    • Leave several around your local college campus. You can also add a recruiting sticker to these since college kids are always looking for ways to make a little money.
    • Leave a few in your local laundromat.
  • Help a Nonprofit Organization. When you hear of your favorite nonprofit holding a future fundraiser, talk to the organizer and arrange to have a table of your products set up at the event. You can donate a percent of profits to the cause. While you won’t personally make money at the event, your presence will make people aware of your business and the quality items you have to offer as well as your philanthropic commitment to the cause 
  • Donate a Prize Keep yourself updated on local fundraisers and networking events. Many of these events host silent auctions or raffles where local businesses donate items for the fundraiser. Donate one of your nicer pieces for the auction or raffle. Your business name and card will accompany any raffle or auction piece. Often, these donations are tax deductible when made to a nonprofit business, but check with your certified public accountant first.  
  • Social Media.  Use Facebook, twitter, blogs, etc. to keep your customers updated on lia sophia discounts, hostess incentives, and recruiting.  Be sure to visit the lia sophia University to read the policy about Facebook rules though!  Remember, you are representing YOURSELF, not lia sophia directly, upload your own snapped photos, not any from lia sophia's website or catalog, and do not make false claims.  
  • Advertise.  Advertising is a slippery slope.  First of all, utilized the pre-approved advertisements at lia sophia University, and be sure not to violate lia sophia's copywrite rules.  (Simply, do not use the lia sophia logo or tag line, and you're good to go).  Advertising can be effective, but it can also be costly, so do your homework.  Find local and inexpensive ways to advertise such as via school programs, yearbooks, church directories, sporting events. Remember your target audience, and keep your message simple, catchy, and relevant.
  • Giveaways.  I hand out candies at the local Halloween Kiddie Parade. This is a great opportunity to get my name out there to the moms, but also get leads at the event.  I have my show display set up on my table, along with hundreds of mini-catalogs with my contact information that I give to each of the moms who come by.  But, I also have a drawing for a FREE $100 jewelry item that the ladies walking by sign up for. This way, I have their contact information to add to my mailing list!  This similar approach can be integrated into a PTO fundraiser, small craft show (be careful of paying $$$ to have a table set up, go for smaller venues that are free or very little cost), or fundraiser event.  
So, there are some ideas to help you start diversifying your marketing approach to help generate new leads when you feel like your inner circle has ran dry.  Remember, keep positive and stick with it, and this business can do amazing things!  But, it will not do it for you.  YOU need to work your business. IT WORKS IF YOU WORK IT!  So, as the new year is approaching, think of ways you can diversify your marketing approach to get your business generating leads and your calendar filling up!